I purchased a new motorcycle helmet recently, and decided to customize it. I had very good luck with printing custom water-slide decals painted with UV-blocking clear-coat (of a formula that doesn’t damage the helmet), and wanted a piece of artwork to apply to the back of the helmet.

What I’m looking for is an anthropomorphic cougar, leaning casually against an (unseen) countertop, wearing a motorcycle jacket and carrying a helmet in one hand. If there are any artists reading who are interested in the commission, drop me an email.

So ends the holidays. Christmas went without much fanfare; visited the parents… I don’t know why I dislike visiting my parents. They treated me well, we never fought, I had a good childhood… I think it’s just that we don’t really have that much in common other than DNA. A fairly common feeling amongst my peer group, I think.

New Years went without much fanfare, as well. Worked New Year’s Eve, but like last year, didn’t dig up any DUIs. Most folks realize if there’s anytime we’re out hunting for drunks, it’s over the holidays. Went for a short ride New Year’s Day. Great weather for riding. I’m glad I got the bike; more so every time I get to ride, but it has been causing me financial worry. Mostly due to my own fiscal mismanagement. I’ll get through it if don’t make any other impulse purchases.

Resolutions? Well, I’ve never made any before this year, so why start now?

As long as I’m feeling sorry for myself (’tis the season) and missing various things (like folks I haven’t talked to in a long time), I might as well whine about something else. When I left my old department for the one I’m currently working for, I had worked on the bomb squad for five years. I don’t regret leaving for the new department; I think it was the best move.

But I really miss working on a bomb squad.

My current department doesn’t have one. I think it should, given that in the year and a half I’ve worked there I’ve responded (without the proper equipment) to 2 bomb threats, 2 hoax devices, and three actual devices. Money, of course, is a big consideration. It takes around $250,000 to equip a small bomb squad, not to mention salary and training costs. This is a small county, with limited resources.

But I still miss working on a bomb squad. It’s a challenge, trying to figure out what’s in a given package, how it was designed, and how to render it safe; without being able to directly see inside it or even touch it. It’s a mental challenge, as well as a physical one; the suit weighs 80 pounds and wearing it for even short periods of time is exhausting.

But I really miss it.

‘Cause I need a vacation. Taught a 2-day radar class and three defensive driving classes in addition to creating a teenage driver safety program over the last two weeks; and today I get one day off before working 4 12-hour days. Then a week off for xmas. Perfect excuse to spend some money on myself, right?

Well, not exactly, because the realities of owning a new bike are coming home; need $130 for that all important first service (around $230 if a valve adjustment is needed). Plus running out to get a torque wrench and a 22mm and 24mm socket for adjusting the chain, which has stretched amazingly in the first 600 miles. I don’t mind doing service myself, but I’d rather the dealer do the first service- haven’t bought a service manual yet (another $60).

Well. Maybe I can squeeze some cash out of CT, who had me working on his website while everything else. Humph.

…with a lot of people I know. Reading Timber’s reply to my ‘blog post made me think about all the folks I haven’t talked to in a long time… Coyote, Timber and Fox, Smash, Pinky and Bow, Wontalla, both Dreamwolf’s, Rowan… the list goes on. If any of you are reading this… I miss you folks, and hope you are doing well…

Started getting a sore throat on the ride back from Orlando, which developed into one of those persistant but low-grade cold-like things that never makes you miserable enough to justify taking sick leave, but hangs on enough to annoy you. I taught a basic radar class yesterday and today, and all the talking hasn’t helped my throat any… and I’m supposed to teach a defensive driving class tomorrow. Not looking forward to that.

And the county had another fatal accident yesterday, just down from the traffic office, ironically enough. I don’t know what number that is for the year, but it’s probably too many no matter how you look at it.

This week is the 2004 SWAT Roundup in Orlando, Florida. SWAT Roundups are competitions between tactical teams from around the world, and the Orlando one is one of the largest. In addition to US teams, there are squads from Germany, Sweden, and Hungary at this year’s roundup. Four of us from my department’s SWAT team came down this year, although we’re not competing- we’re taking classes on a variety of subjects.

The drive down Sunday, for lack of a better word, sucked ass. Apparently, everyone was headed back from Thanksgiving at the same time I was on the road, and the average speed on I-75 from north of Valdosta all the way to the Florida Turnpike was about 45 mph. You’d drive 80 or so for ten minutes, and then traffic would slam on the brakes before crawling at 30 for 20 minutes; apparently for no reason whatsoever. Florida drivers suck.

After a night in a strange hotel bed (note: not a stranger’s bed), I attended Explosive Breaching class- quite interesting. Explosive breaching works very well, with very little collateral damage, from the little we saw in the class. Afterwards was the Hostage Rescue competition, which we watched from the bleachers. The best teams were, not suprisingly, the local ones; they’ve had the most practice at the training facility.

Aaaand, I’m tired and time for bed… pictures and more later.

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Day 2 – Nov. 30

Day 2 was Tactical Rifle class in the morning, and the Pritcher Scramble competition in the afternoon. Tac Rifle didn’t really show me much new, other than the department’s AR-15 needs to be sighted in. The Pritcher Scramble had teams vaulting three low walls, donning gas masks, firing a gas round into a window, then breaching a door, engaging a moving target, and returning back over the walls. A vendor on another range also set the berm on fire while demonstrating a flash-bang… whoooops.

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Day 3 – Dec. 1

Day 3 was WMD for Tactical Teams in the morning, which didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know; and a competition whose name escapes me but involved zip-lining over a pond, running to the range to engage a series of metal targets, running back to the pond and getting a wounded man and yourself across the zip line, and then carrying him to the finish line. One of the Swedish team’s competitors didn’t fasten his thigh holster and his pistol went *bloop* into the pond. Whoooops. That night we went to the nightclubs in downtown Orlando… I’m waaay out of practice as far as drinking heavily goes.

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Day 4 – Dec. 2

Day 4 there were no classes, so we went to the Orlando PD’s indoor range to see how it was constructed and to shoot a lot of ammo at their pop-up steel targets. I learned that indoor ranges are expensive as hell, and that I need to go to the range more often to practice. Afterwards, we piled up and headed home.

Explosive Breaching video 1
Explosive Breaching video 2

I purchased my first bike in 7 years (as well as my first new bike) recently. Several things kept me from riding before this… my previous bike, an ’82 Yamaha Seca 650, had died a second time (the 650 mill had over 100k miles on it, and the salvaged ’83 750 engine I swapped it with had who knows how many); I really couldn’t afford another bike; most of the people I’d been riding with either drifted off or sold their bikes; and I’d never really gotten over my apprehension after a wreck at Suches a few years before. So, I fell out of the motorcycling world, ignoring the advances and the bikes that passed me every day.

Then the bug hit my co-workers over the summer. Everyone began making plans to buy bikes; once they found out I used to ride, they began pestering me to buy one and ride with them. One by one, they took the MSF course and bought their bikes; occassionally, I’d ride with them on a borrowed bike. My roommate even bought two bikes in the space of 2 months, selling the first (GS500F) to his girlfriend. But I still resisted- while I was making enough now to afford a new one, I’m still getting over credit problems from five years ago. Plus, I was still replaying the wreck in my head. The wreck was a result of my overconfidence in my riding abilities, and forgetting everything I’d been taught about riding. We were riding in Suches; I was on the GPz305 and was getting tired of being left by the larger bikes. I was riding a section of Ga. 60 that I hadn’t been on before, and entered a right-hand curve faster than I should have. Instead of leaning further, and low-siding if it got to that point, I froze up and rode off the outside of the curve. The bike stopped in the ditch and I went over the handlebars, landing on the very top of my kevlar and fiberglass Bieffe helmet. End result: A three inch crack in the top of my helmet, a gouge in the faceshield (never figured out what from), a dent in the gas tank from my knee, and a concussion. I got off light. The bike was ridable and I rode it back home, but I was bit gun-shy after that. (I’ve since determined that my last words will probably be “Ooohhhh SHIIIIIT!”, as that’s been what I’ve said in every wreck I’ve ever had, car or bike.) Even on the rides I took after my roommate got a bike, I was still nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

What began to cure me was giving tips to my roommate, who’d never ridden before. We talked about what he learned in his MSF course, and I offered my own riding experiences. We dissected my wreck, what happened and why, and what I should have done. He’d come back from rides and talk about something new he experienced, and it reminded me of similar situations I’d faced. And gradually, I realized I didn’t really have any excuse for not riding. I finally started shopping for real. True sport-tourers- the FJ1300, ST1100, etc.- were out of my price range, but the Bandit seemed to fit the bill. I rode mine home a week ago from Action Motorsports in Loganville. My roomie and I took a couple of short rides; I took a solo ride in the rain (digging out my rainsuit from the back of the closet).

Friday, the roommate wanted to go for a longer ride- he wanted to go to Suches. Here it comes- would riding that curve again be a problem? Yes, I had 10 years of riding under my belt; but a big gap since the last time I’d ridden. For all intents and purposes, I’m a new rider again. I agreed to go, and cautioned him to ride his own ride- don’t worry about if I or he is falling behind; ride the pace he’s comfortable with. The advice was mainly for myself.

It wasn’t too cold; mid-50s or so. I warmed up gradually up Ga. 60, remembering the fun I had on this stretch of road years ago, and built my confidence up. I didn’t let it get built up too far- and a wreck on Ga. 180 helped; a younger rider on a Gixxer low sided his bike off the side of the mountain. He was OK, and we helped him get the bike up the hill again, but it reminded both of us what our limits are.

And I found that moment again- where I went into a curve faster than I thought I should. This time I told myself “Lean it this time, idiot!” I did, and Bandit held the curve as nice as you’d want. After a few more fast back-and-forth curves, I remembered why I started riding in the first place.

Despite the amount of time I’ve spent riding- a drop in the bucket compared to a lot of folks- I’ve still got a lot to learn. One of them, one I think I’ve realized, is that obsessing over a long-ago accident isn’t productive. Learn from it and move on. I think I’ve calmed down enough from when I first started riding, at 19, to realize that I’m not invulnerable, and when I start to think that I can ride any curve is when I’m the most dangerous to myself.

And most importantly, riding is a damn lot of fun.

Saturday, November 20, 2004

Been about 7 years, but I’m back on a bike. My last bike died peacefully after a long illness, and I never got around to buying another one; although I often looked lustfully at other’s bikes. And then… my roommate bought a bike. And my neighbor. And several of my co-workers. And I got tired of hearing of how great the last ride was, while remembering how much fun I used to have riding. So… Friday I bought a silver 2003 Suzuki Bandit 1200S with 2 miles on the odometer. Maaaan… things have changed since the last time I was riding. I’m quite pleased so far. See the Garage page for a pic…

Wasn’t in the office this week, as several deputies from Lowndes County were up training with us on I-85. Fairly productive training- 5 arrests and 14 kilos of cocaine seized. Lot of long nights. Luckily, I now have a bike to ride to unwind!

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Well, starting Monday, I’m an office bitch. I’m still on the traffic unit, but I’ll be flying a desk. Did I get injured and put on light duty? Did I finally snap and pull that annoying, shrill bitch who told me she hoped I had a shitty day for giving her a ticket through her car window and beat her senseless? Did those pictures of me naked in a hot-tub full of lime jello with an underage donkey finally surface? No, no, and not yet.

You see, the traffic unit was originally created as not only an enforcement unit, but an educational one. Programs for high schools and the public, press releases, informational pamphlets in conjunction with concentrated patrols, etcetera. After a while, though, the unit ended up just writing tickets- that’s easier than creating educational programs, after all. The Sheriff, however, doesn’t really care about tickets- the educational aspect was his deal. So, after a review of the unit, he decided that it should start getting back to the reason it was created- safer roads through enforcement and education. Which means that the unit has to create all those programs, which involves researching what other traffic units have done, decide what elements we want to use and what we want in each program, and then create the programs and actually present them. That’s going to take some time, organization, and computer time. And since I’m the only one othe traffic unit who can turn on a computer, I’ve been drafted to create the educational programs.

Which is ok by me, actually. I’ve been getting a little burnt out on doing nothing but writing tickets. Wearing a polo shirt instead of a kevlar vest for a while will be a nice change.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Halloween’s over, and we didn’t have as many trick-or-treators as I thought we would, with as many kids as there are in this neighborhood. Used a dremel tool to carve the pumpkin- a lot quicker than a knife, although it makes pumpkin puree.

On the topic of last week’s post, my sergeant has lightened up some- I think someone had a talk with him. Things are a lot more relaxed. On a completely different note, I bought a set of 5.1 speakers for my desktop and turned on the surround features of my Audigy sound card. I don’t have perfect speaker separation, as there isn’t a good spot to put the rear speakers, but Infiltration sounds reeeeeealllly good. I’ll have to screw around with making dolby 5.1 videos now.

And don’t forget to vote tomorrow!