Soooo… *taps fingers together nervously*

I’ve been cheating on you, ‘blog. I… I made my last few essays on… Twitter! That hussy…

Anyway, yeah, I’m gonna post ’em up here just to have a unbroken post. They were composed for twitter, which for me is different from how I write on here. First up: The time I met Roy Moore:

 

So. The time I met Roy Moore. A tale of evangelicals trying to erase the line between Church and State, and claiming martyrdom when the State says no. Sound familiar? Well, this was 2004; and it’s only gotten worse. I first wrote about it shortly after it happened in September 2004 on my ‘blog; but you’ll notice I was very low-key… This was where I worked and lived, and the feeling of being surrounded was very strong; despite the fact that 3 people would ever see it.

Roy who? you might ask. That’s fair; despite bubbling to the top of the news pile from time to time, much like a turd in a septic tank, he’s been quiet lately amidst the other noise. You know, the guy that was the Alabama Chief Justice who got sued into oblivion over placing a granite copy of the Ten Commandments in the rotunda of the Supreme Court of Alabama. It wasn’t the last time he’d be kicked off the bench; he did it again in 2016 by attempting to ignore Obgerfell. THAT Roy Moore.

Not more than a year after his first booting, the county I was Sheriff’s Deputy in had also placed a picture of the Ten Commandments in the county courthouse, and had also been sued by the ACLU. Jody Hice– recognize THAT name? US Representative from Georgia? Who was- at the time- the senior pastor of Bethlehem First Baptist Church in the county, created a group called the Ten Commandment-Georgia Inc., and held a $50 a plate fundraiser dinner to fund the county’s legal fees. All legal and aboveboard, you understand; not being run by a church at all, especially not one whose senior pastor had a series of sermons based around how churches should be allowed to form a lobby. And who asked for a Deputy to guard the church during these sermons in case those godless heathens who would DARE oppose destroying the barrier between Church and State tried to assassinate him. Yeah. As entry team leader for the SWAT team, I got to be that lucky deputy.

ANYWAY, back to September 2004, and the fundraising dinner. Barrow is one of those southern counties that they would have used when filming “Walking Tall” (the 1973 one); and in fact has connections to the Dixie Mafia (yes, a real thing). But it’s proximity to both Atlanta and Athens meant it had to be drug kicking and screaming into the modern era. No less an august, god-fearing persona than ROY MOORE was coming to town! He must be protected at all costs! Now, while there had been some mild protests by the 30 or so ACLU members in Barrow County, there was no reason to think ANTIFA was coming.

 

God forbid. But, yes, the Sheriff does have a responsibility to ensure that no one gets hurt, even if you don’t particularly like them. So, it fell on SWAT to provide close cover and surveillance, and the Traffic Unit to provide escort and visible presence. I was a member of both units at the time, so we planned an escort route from the airport to the courthouse for speeches; and then on to the dinner and back to the airport afterwards. Crowd control units were on standby, but no one thought they’d be needed. SWAT had spotter units on the roof of a couple of buildings, and plainclothes mixing with the crowd. Regular deputies around the perimeter and inside. Lots of overkill, but you know, be prepared; and all that. So a 4 car progression escorted his limo from the airport.

Leapfrogging to the next intersection, I felt for the drivers we were inconveniencing; because… come on. Lights and siren to escort this toad? Shit.

Speech at the courthouse was typical BS; didn’t listen too much because my job was to watch the crowd. It’s BS; but it was my job, and I took my job seriously.

On to the dinner! …Held at the church, of course. We spread out and watched the plate buyers eat BBQ chicken and mashed potatoes. At this point, after 7 hours of sweating in a vest (Georgia in Sept. is still hot) cocooning this idiot we were tired, sweaty, and hungry. Not one of these assholes offered us any food. The entertainment for the meal came from a group of church teens who had come up with a dance routine based off of “Onward Christian Soldiers”, complete with a light show and a loud sound system. Churches have gotten theatrical lately. Several late teen boys (white, natch; this is a very white Southern Baptist church) dressed in the red/black/grey “urban” camo pants that went very well with nearby University of Georgia football colors and black t-shirts with black Army-style ball caps covering closely shorn buzz-cuts began a dance routine involving singing about the Army of God while miming firing rifles, swinging sticks, and lifting weights.

Yeah. Geezus. That sentence made me tired, too.

While this spectacle was laughable on it’s face- my roommate, another deputy, said it reminded him of the Monty Python “Gay Army” sketch– it brought other associations to my mind. Another youth group, frequently appearing in ’30s propaganda films and featuring young men wearing red armbands and military garb. The choice of imagery they used wasn’t accidental. And they’ve been brewing this since waaaay before 2004.

Oh… Did I mention he’s running against the Georgia Secretary of State in 2022? Before the next Presidential election?